Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Just Us

We’ve always had a tradition in our family whereas my siblings and I like to spend time with each other a few times a year, less spouses or significant others.

My husband is fine with it. I also encourage him to spend time with his parents or sister alone, without me every once and a while. Whenever I make that suggestion to him, he always looks at me quizzically.

Regardless, I do think it is okay to spend time alone with just the family you grew up in, if only once or twice a year. For my siblings, it gives us a chance to open up and reminisce about old times.

I know with near certainty that my husband can only tolerate all of our many childhood, coming of age stories so much. The tales only get bigger and we laugh harder – he smiles along.

How do you feel about one on one time with your siblings? Or do you think it should always be one big happy family?

13 comments:

  1. I think it is actually comforting for all parties involved to have a little time away and focus on the "good old days."

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  2. My sister lives close by so we spend time together a lot. I also spend a lot of time with my mom. I think it is healthy to have that time with family members. Hey TV, the vote button is on my blog in the sidebar. :) I hope you are well! Have a great night!

    Mama Hen

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  3. It seems that there is always something going on that involves inviting the entire family. I've never really considered just hanging with the original siblings, though (I guess b/c we see so much of each other at the usual holidays & get togethers). I'm sure the in-laws get tired of our shenanigans sometimes, but they've learned to cope or just not come which is okay, too, in my opinion. I sometimes like to just hang out with my "family of procreation"--just me, the hubs and the kiddoes--even on major holidays! No one else in my family understands this as they feel that every holiday should be a huge family affair. The hubs' family is the same way, so we often end up rushing from one gathering to another on major holidays, and no one is satisfied--we've left one home too early and arrive somewhere else too late. I usually go and grin and bear it because when the time comes that we are no longer close (geographically-speaking) or someone is called home then I'm sure I'll miss the huge family affairs.

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  4. I left comments on a couple of your older posts, too, TV. Don't know if you have a way of being alerted to new comments on old messages. If you do, let me know!

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  5. this post makes me WISH I had siblings. Who am I kidding? I've always wanted a brother or a sister. I think the time alone would be nice with them, the only way I can relate is by saying I love nights with the girls...having some friend time, just the girls...to laugh and crack each other up over old stories about growing up!

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  6. I completely agree with you. I am middle middle of five children. We make a point several times a year to do things without the rest of the family. We always have a lot of fun. Sometimes we actually play hide and seek or kick ball as if no time has passed. We refuse to ever grow up when we are around each other. My two younger siblings and I still fight and then tell our mom on one another. She loves that all of her kids are still super close. I wouldn't trade my relationship with them for anything.

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  7. definitely okay to share time with family sans husband. I am lucky enough to live near my siblings and parents(and a few of his, too), so i get together with my sister/sister-in-law on a regular basis(once a week usually), and see my mom all the time, and we talk constantly. I even go and hang out with my husbands Mom without him, and his sisters. So we all get along great, and see each other together and apart. It's good for everyone's relationship.And he prefers to have me spend time with my family without him at least some of the time, it gives him some alone time!

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  8. I had not really had that one on one time with anyone in my family until I had my child and my mom flew out and spent a whole week with just me. The hubs was at work most of the time and of course I had a baby but, she didn't distract at the time. Then my 16 year old sister flew out recently and that was the first time she and I have spent that kind of time together and it was wonderful!! I would love to have more get togethers like that. It was special and we bonded much more closely! I think it's a great idea!

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  9. My husband loves me to go it alone with my sister. He can't stand her, so I think that's a different thing than what you're talking about!

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  10. I really like this idea, although for our family since we are so spread out it doesn't happen often. When we do get up north to hang out with family it's usually our whole family that goes. I can see the benefit in time spent alone with siblings, to reminesce your childhood, share stories, and spend a few moments being the family you were. I think this is a great idea!

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  11. Hi. First of all, I want to say thank you for coming by our site! My friends and I are close, but we love getting others input and, in fact, very much want that! It has been nice to get your input!
    My sister and I are 9 years apart and couldn't be more different, but I still enjoy just her and I time. She is the only one who understands our parents! My husband totally does not understand though. He sees his family rarely, and does not feel the need to do anything with any of his siblings alone. Could it be a guy thing? Sometimes I think it is because his parents got divorced and his family pretty much split at that point and has never really came back together. I think it's sad and I encourage him often to stay in contact with his family, whether he likes them or not.

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  12. I think it is important to have both time alone with your family and as one big happy family. I am like you sometimes I just need to spend time with my family and open up and just talk about stuff that sometimes other people just don't care about but us.

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  13. Your comment about you all yacking it up and your husband smiling along hit home. Often when I spend time with my husband's family (mine is all overseas except for my parents and sister) they tell old stories and laugh like crazy and I sit there and think "someone save me, I've heard this 4 times before and never got it, I have no idea what these people are talking about!" I do encourage my hubby to spend one-on-one family time but he's not into it. Maybe it's a woman thing...

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