Friday, January 7, 2011

Telling Each Other What We Want To Hear

Have you ever been in a conversation with someone (or with yourself) and all you hear is what they want to believe, how they want to be perceived?

Of course we are all guilty of it. The most unfortunate aspect of deceiving others/ourselves is that it’s usually in a time when we need to be the most honest, the most real, the most sincere.

As you grow older, are you getting better about communicating the reality of a situation or are you getting better at fooling yourself and others?

15 comments:

  1. Yes! As I get older I feel that I am learning to speak more clearly what it is exactly that I mean or feel (thank God). I find that I often have to pause when I am speaking and think about how to express myself instead of just rambling on without thinking. That pause gives me time to collect my thoughts if they are getting jumbled and to be true to myself by giving more thought to what I am trying to say. It's so refreshing!

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  2. as I've grown older, I feel more comfortable in my own skin...however, there are times when I can be intimidated by certain people that come off as if they are better than me??! As I've aged, I'm CERTAINLY a better communicator...and that makes ALL of my relationships the BEST they can be :) Including my blog friendships with all of YOU!!

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  3. I am definitely better at telling the truth, but I am afraid I have hurt others by doing it. I need to strike a balance. I need to learn how to deliver the news without so much "brashness."

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  4. What a great question! In higher education, I see college administrators do this all the time. Sometimes I feel like they are a bunch of actors running around trying to prove how smart they are...
    For the most part, I really try to just be me..., but there are times when I have to pretend that everything's okay, even when it's not. Even on my blog, I only share the good moments, even though this past year, I've had a lot of tough ones. I'm only truly authentic with my closest friends.

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  5. Both depending upon my company. Some people are so close minded and have heard what they want to hear for so long that I feel there is no point stirring the pot and telling them once and for all how I perceive things. These relationships tend to matter less to me than those of true honesty where even I could get hurt by the truth of the matter. I will take honesty and hurt feelings (which can usually heal) to falsehoods and halfhearted relationships any day. So I have gotten better at "spotting" people I can be honest with and those I can't.

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  6. As I grow older, I mean wiser!, I get better at being a straight shooter...or so I hope. Guess it depends on the recipient, huh? Hope you all are having a wonderful weekend! I'm over-cooking as usual but I so prefer leftovers to crappy frozen lunches.

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  7. Great Post! Hope you had a wonderful weekend.

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  8. I hope getting better being totally open and honest. I give it more thought, anyway. Studying Proverbs makes you a bit more sensitive to even the nuances of issues. Good post, TV. wb

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  9. I have several relationships that I just tell the people what they want to hear. One of them is my sister. God help the person that tells her like it is. If you want to have a nice day, lie!

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  10. Great post! I feel like I am getting better at standing up for myself and saying what I really feel. I used to keep it all in as to not rough the waters. I am also getting better at hearing the honest truth and being okay with it. It's all such a growing process.

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  11. I saw your comment on my spinach recipe...I can't reply to your comments b/c your email is blocked :) The goat cheese sure makes it yummy. We had snow AGAIN in Atlanta...about 4-5 inches! Nuts! We made a redneck sled out of cardboard and packing tape and had a blast outside. Hope you all had a lovely Monday. I think I'm going to get "stuck" working from home again tomorrow :)

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  12. Yes TV I think I am getting better about saying the things I feel and dealing with what people say. I do not put up with as much garbage as I used to. As I get older I feel like there is not enough time for dealing with things that don't elevate me. I hope you are doing great! Have a super night!

    Mama Hen

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  13. Haha...some times I wish I could just say what people want to hear! I'm always been frank and blunt, to a fault...

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  14. I love the people I can be the most honest and blunt with, and unfortunately that is not everyone. I have three dear friends I can be that way with. Outside of that box, I walk on eggshells. You just learn who you can be real with, and who you need to "tell what they want to hear". That's why I love blogging. I feel like I can be the most honest, right here, without any consequence of effecting my daily life. In a sense, it's an outlet to freedom that until now I have not experienced.

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  15. I like being able to share struggles with friends, I think it's a special bond. I've liked being open and real since college and then had a few situations that were challenging and I shut down for a while. I'm recovering and moving forward to trust people again.

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