Friday, February 10, 2012

Do Something For You

During a recent conversation with a good friend we discussed how she’s immersed in her family.  She’s a dedicated Mom.  An awesome quality.  On the flip side we discussed how she doesn’t do anything for herself.  She lost a part of herself over the last several years.   She is in an honest funk.

Mom’s are the worst at this.  Day by day mom’s slowly wave goodbye to the things that make them happy.  Sure their family makes them happy but let’s be honest, their family should not define them, at least not completely. 

Children want their parents to be solid, happy, loving and well rounded.  Being lost and in a funk (because some of us swallow our personal wants and needs) doesn’t make for an excellent parent or partner for that matter. 

About 1.5 years ago I found myself in this situation so I took up pilates and starting writing.  These two things add dimension to my life which I’m able to share with my family by feeling more well rounded, more satisfied.   

So, what are you doing for you?

13 comments:

  1. Even though I don't have kids, I do have my one "something" I like to do - Blogging. However, I do miss my zumba. :-)

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  2. I agree with you 100%. All of the moms that I know how battle that funk too often are the ones that would admit that they don't really have anything for just them to let them recharge and refresh. I have photography, blogging and as many friend get togethers as possible to have adult conversations:). I adore my little one but, a momma just needs a break from time to time. I really should take up an exercise class as those things kick in more happy endorphines which is always good! :)

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  3. I feel like no matter what stage of life you're in you can end up in a funk. For me, I take time to have alone time, whether that's going to the gym, reading, or watching TV. I've found that training for running races has really become something that I do for me now though. Running is something I'm really passionate about, and it's become something I'm proud to say I do for me.

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  4. i exercise for ME and my family. makes me feel so good and totally empowers me each day. i think working out keeps me sane and not so chubby!!! ha!

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  5. oh and the house is great, thank you so much for asking...we are all settled and it totally feels like home. more to clean, but that's ok...we are loving it!

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  6. If I ever could have a Genie grant me one wish, it would be to have more time in the day... I've been in a funk...not because I'm not doing anything for myself, but because I don't feel like I have enough time to do anything well. I've been trying to juggle being a good mom with work, with writing my own book, with blogging, and with being a good friend/wife/daughter, etc. In the end, it's not working. I feel like I'm trying to balance too many things, and in the process, I'm horrible at all of them because I don't have enough time to dedicate to each. (As you know, this doesn't work well with a Type A attitude that wants to be good at everything.) Ugh! Thanks for letting me vent. What a great post!

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  7. Doing something that is just for you is so important. As moms, we set a very high bar for ourselves. We have these little people that depend on us for everything so it's difficult to make the time for ourselves. But we have to, it's just as important as making sure our kids are fed, clean, and happy. I blog, even if it means waking up before the sun rises to get my post written.

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  8. Writing has done wonders for my sanity and sense of self. The trouble is I feel awful too when I'm in a rut and can't seem to produce even one decent short paragraph. Oh well.... :-)

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  9. That's a good question...I guess reading and then the occasional pedicure...guess I need to add to this list!

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  10. Very good point. I lost myself for almost a decade. I finally got it back about a year ago with writing, starting my baking business, buying flowers for myself and finally telling my family that I need help with house instead of me trying to do everything (and failing miserably!). Now the house stays clean, I'm happier, which makes them happy! It was hard, but very necessary, for the entire family, that I find myself again!

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  11. You do have to take care of your needs before tending to others -- if that isn't done, you can easily burn out. A common battle for mommies!

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  12. I got very lucky. When my first child was only a few months old, I started working at home. This actually led to McDonalds lunch dates with other moms, evening phone calls with other moms etc. It allowed me that social time that many moms miss when their kids are young. Today, my kids are older. I still have lunch with friends. I walk daily. I crochet and I love a few games on Facebook.

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  13. I loved this post! I'm not a mom yet but I hope I keep making some time for myself (some time not all the time) it is important!

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